Goodbye, "friends"

It's no secret I like the games on Facebook. But to succeed at some of the games, you're required to have massive numbers of friends, sometimes people you don't even know. So they're not even real friends. They're fake Facebook friends.

Well, after watching a recent infomercial on a type of cleansing, I decided that I had 61 fake friends to whom I needed to bid farewell. They've served their purpose, and I'm moving on, like ripping off a giant bandage.

I need to make room in my Facebook life for the 178 friends I actually know. Don't worry, Facebook doesn't tell your friends when you remove them. And now a tribute to those I've left:

Goodbye to Toxin and Priyesh. Goodbye to Toland “(Psi)lent Partner” Michael, you party dog, you. Goodbye Jaster, Belle Smith and Annette, whose status today was “wondering do you really laughing out loud when you type lol."

Goodbye Leandro Santini, Barry White and Kimberly Mattson Richardson and your endless invites to games. I won't be joining your crews, mobs, clans, kingdoms, cults, families, pirate ships, armies, empires or raiding parties. I already have my own, thank you.

Goodbye Joe Gill, you should really change your profile picture. Smoking isn't exactly becoming of you. Goodbye Khari Grant, you and your fake name.

Goodbye Emil Rysgaard Jensen, from Denmark. Ja det er da rigtig nok længe side. Jeg har det godt, hvad med dig, jeg høre at du også har flyttet skole, det bare noget tid siden nu :)

Goodbye Adam Kasycz. I never could pronounce your last name. Goodbye Jo Lite. Some of your friends have creepy profile photos. Goodbye Dan Marut, Ian Fitzpatrick, David Allister and Benjamin Howe, even though I just added you today.

But one shall remain. AaReycle Bin. I love your profile picture and everything you stand for. And you have 678 friends. I'm glad to be one of them.
That feels better.